Toby's Eyes
by Avalon Jane
Summary: This is a fanfiction, again for PLL, about Toby's perspective of things. It starts at their breakup scene in his truck in season 2's Over My Dead Body. This is how he felt and what he thought and I'll continue from their later.
1. Over My Dead Body

Spencer and I had been rough lately. Things weren't going well with our relationship and I was worried that it might get so bad that it might end. I didn't want that to happen. I couldn't let it happen. I was at work when I decided that the minute I finished I would go to Spencer's house and fix this. I couldn't lose her. She was my safe place to land, and I was hers. Just after I had decided to go see her, I heard her voice call me.

"Toby?" She asked me. I turned to see a very sad looking Spencer. She had that lost puppy look on that made anyone feel bad for her.

"Can we talk. It's important." She said. Something was wrong. Very wrong.

"Of course." I replied. Then noticing my co-workers around me, I realized she would want a bit more privacy. I walked over to her, and gently guided her by her arm to the passenger side of my truck. I closed the door after she was inside, and then walked around to the drivers seat. Whatever she had to tell me was going to be big. She was clearly upset, and whatever she needed to tell me I had to be ready for. I took a breath and opened the door.

"Spencer," I began. We had been sitting in the car for a few minutes, but she hadn't said anything. "You're scaring me. I mean, you said it was important but you're not talking." There was short silence before she responded.

"That's because," she paused "I know that when you hear what I have to say, you'll realize I'm not the person you think I am."

"No, that, that's not true." I responded, hoping it wasn't. She never ceased to surprise me, but those surprises were usually good. This was, definitely, not good.

"I lied to you this morning." She said. That made me realize that I was the thing that was wrong with her. She didn't trust me. "My dad told me a lot more than to mind my own business." She finished.

"I feel like we've been in this together with your family and with Jason, too. So what I don't understand is why you lied." My emotions were doing the talking now. I was letting out all the hurt she had cause me from just one little lie. She took in a sharp breath.

"There's so much that you don't know, and I can never tell you." That pretty much set a record for a heartbreak. I loved her, and I'd do anything for her, tell her anything. But she, apparently, wasn't able to do the same. So I said the one thing I knew would most likely end our relationship, but I had to get an answer.

"Don't you trust me?" I asked her. When she didn't respond, I realized what her answer was. "I thought we felt the same way about each other." I said. This couldn't be happening. I meant to fix this relationship, that sentence, just screwed it up beyond repair. She was on the verge of tears. She was in just as much pain as I was over this. She took in another breath.

"Look, I've figured out a way to survive my secrets, but everyone I care about gets hurt. And you deserve to be with someone who can be honest with you, so I'm sorry." And with that, she ran out of the truck. "Spence," I said. Getting out of the car. "Spencer, wait!" I got out to see her running around the corner and out of my line of vision. She ran away, and took my life with her. What had I done?


	2. Cops and Confrontations

The rest of my day revolved around Spencer. At least, in my head it did. All I could think about was her. I replayed the scene in my mind, from where she told me there was something she couldn't tell me, to the part where I deserved someone who could be honest with me. I didn't want that if it wasn't her, though. And come to think of it, I didn't deserve someone who'd be truthful to me. I didn't even deserve her. But that wouldn't stop me from fighting for her. I wasn't walking away.

After work, I drove to Spencer's house. I walked up the path to the front door and knocked, louder than I probably meant to. Soon her dad opened the door, almost grimacing at the sight of me.

"Is Spencer here?" I asked urgently

"No, she's not." He responded dryly, closing the door. I stopped it from completely shutting by inserting my foot in between the frame and the door itself.

"Do you know where I can find her?" Letting the desperation I felt seep through my words.

"Try checking the police station." He said in a 'you're an idiot for not keeping tabs on your girlfriend' look.

"What is she doing there?" I asked him, genuinely concerned for Spencer's well-being.

"She has been detained. See what I meant when I said you were a bad influence." I wanted to hit him. Not for insulting me, or Spencer, but for the fact that his daughter was in jail, and he was just sitting here, like a bum, doing God knows what.

"Wait, so she's in jail, and you don't even care?" I asked, trying, but failing, to stifle the anger I felt towards him.

"She disgraced our family name by going and getting locked up in a jail cell, she is nothing to me anymore."

"So you just leave her there alone?" I yelled.

"That's none of your concern. Get lost before I call someone to lock you up too."

"I'm not leaving. Not until you hear this. I love her, and you should too. Your her father for crying out loud! I'm not going to try to convince you to go there because I know you won't. So I'll go myself." With that I turned and ran down the path, out the gate, and to my truck. I started the car.

About ten minutes later I arrived at the police station. I walked in, not bothering to sign in as a visitor. I was stopped by officers clearly meant for people like me, trying to get to to the four of them.

"Sir, please step back."

"No, you don't understand. I have to see my girlfriend."

"Spencer Hastings is not allowed visitors at this time." The fact that he knew that Spencer and I were an item should've surprised me, but it would have been even weirder if they didn't know. The police have kept an extremely close eye on us ever since Spencer became a person of interest.

"Can I please see her for just a minu- Spencer!" She had come from an interrogation room hidden around a corner. She was filthy, covered in dirt, and her once beautiful dress was now tattered and torn. She was still the most gorgeous girl in the world to me.

"Spencer! Listen, I don't care what you can't tell me, I care about you! I love you. Do you hear me? I love you! Spencer!"

She heard me, she just couldn't do anything about it. Something, besides a police man, was holding her back. Probably the same thing that wound her up here. I had to put a stop to it. She might be okay with whoever this was walking all over her, but I was not. I was going to find out who was doing this to her, and make them pay for it.

So that was my task for the next few weeks. That and getting back the person I was in love with. It was going to be difficult, but I could do it. I was Toby Cavanaugh. I survived reform school, jail, a perverted step-sister, and a dead girls' torment. I sure as hell could handle this.


	3. A Hot Piece of A

After the incident at the police station I hadn't really seen Spencer. She had purposely been avoiding me so I couldn't talk to her. It was tearing me apart, not seeing her. Without her around, my life felt empty. No, scratch that. Not empty, gone. Without her around,I felt like I would rather die. I could've. I could have made everything so much easier for myself and just ended it. But where would that leave her? I worry that if I leave her, she'll never forgive me and hate me forever. And who would protect her? Her family certainly wouldn't. Her father might have un-disowned her, but it's not like he actually cared about her. Not like I did.

When I had gotten the job with Peter Hastings, I was hoping it would be a good thing. But instead, he only grew to dislike me more. He claimed, one day, that it wasn't my fault that I had a bad reputation, but that didn't change the fact that I had one in the first place. Her parents and sister were all about image. If she wasn't perfect they would act they didn't know her, or she was some kind of monster. Spencer Hastings, my Spencer, was anything but. Only now, she didn't want to be mine, or me to be hers. She acted as if she wanted nothing to do with me. It's started to get to me. It made me wonder if she ever actually loved me, or if she was just using me to get answers, or maybe just piss of her family.

I was securing some tools in the bed of my truck one day, and I heard footsteps behind me. My heart hoped it was her, but my head knew it wasn't. _It's probably just someone walking past on their way to lunch,_ I said to myself. But sure enough it was her.

"Hi." She said meekly. When she did, I whipped around to see her, standing closer than she had in a long time. I hoped I didn't look to shocked that she was there.

"Hey, can we talk?" She said, now sounding like her normal self. I couldn't find the strength to speak, her presence was messing with me, like always. I signaled the porch with my eyes.

"Could we do it some place a little more private?" She asked me. With that I stood up a bit straighter, able to regain my usual calmness. I started to walk to the front seat of the truck and, getting the message, Spencer followed. We weren't even sitting in the car a second before she started talking.

"Look, I know that you want answers. And I'm close, I am so close to giving them to you." She breathed out quickly. "But it's still not safe." I rolled my eyes a bit at her last statement.

"Then why did you come here?" I asked her. I was getting annoyed at how every time she lead me to believe I would get answers, she ripped away the hope I had for being able to help her. I looked over at her. She shook her head a bit before responding.

"Because I missed you." She said as we maid eye contact. "Shutting you out is killing me." She said. The lost puppy look was back, and this time it really made me sorry for her. She had been practicing.

"So you came here to tell me you can't be here." I said, a small smile on my face. She returned the smile as I put an arm around her. I now had a full smile on and so did she. We both let out soft laughs before I moved in to kiss her. It felt good, really good, to be able to do that again. It was then I realized how much I had truly missed her. All of my doubts in her faded away as I pushed her to lay down on the seats.

Our kiss was interrupted by a voice near the truck.

"Hey can we not do this on the phone please I'm outside your house." Spencer and I recognized that voice as Garret Reynolds'. We sprang up to see what was going on. The minute I was in a full sitting position my head fogged. I couldn't see for a minute, but I could still hear.

"Stop punishing me and just open the damn door." He said into the phone. By now my vision had returned to normal and I looked over to see Spencer's curious expression.

"Please!" He demanded more than asked. By now it was more than clear that he was talking to Jenna.

_Great,_ I thought _here we go again. _

"What is going on?" She asked as Garett pounded on the door.

"It's been like fight club since last night." I explained. "They were arguing on the porch she slammed the door in his face," I was about to continue but Spencer interrupted.

"Wait this started last night?" I nodded as a reply.

"I think it's nerves. Jenna plays it cool but she's freaking about having the eye operation." We both looked into the side mirror to see Garett still pacing on the porch. Our conversation had blocked out theirs and we had missed a bit of what he said.

"Yeah? Well that's what happens when it's not just the two of us. No, no the mistake, was pulling in somebody else. Asking him to help us was a bad idea Jenna." I shook my head as he continued. "It was a bad move. No, no I warned you. No it was your idea." He continued but Spencer talked over him.

"This doesn't sound like it's about an eye operation; who's he? Who are they talking about?" I shrugged, and was about to speak when Garett's voice got louder.

"Listen, no Jenna wait, don't hang up. Just answer the door. Uh, Jenna, no wait, just wait a second. No don't hang up just come to the door. Jenna? Jenna? Damn it!" He said just before he turned and walked off my porch. I heard Spencer gasp as she slid out of Garett's view. Just after she had ducked, he turned and made eye contact with me. He stared me down skeptically and I did the same. I raised my eyebrows at him, telling him, basically, 'I told you so'. He then continued walking and left in his car.

Now I was worried. Spencer saw that entire confrontation and I knew she would try to get involved. I had to protect her from Jenna. I didn't want them to be within ten feet of each other. I knew what Jenna was capable of, and so did she. Hopefully now, everything would be easier. Protecting her seemed a lot more attainable now that we were back together. I just hoped that it stayed that way.


	4. The Blonde Leading the Blind

I grabbed my keys and headed downstairs to my truck. I started it up and drove the 10 blocks between Spencer's and my home. I still had to finish picking up the tools and scaffolding I had left at her place. When I arrived, I pulled into her backyard and parked next to the scaffolding. I called Spencer, telling her that I was here to pick up my things. It rang a few times, and finally someone picked up, only it wasn't Spence.

"Hey" I heard Emily say into the phone.

"Hey," I replied. I looked up to Spencer's window and saw her. "Is Spencer around?"

"Um," she said, hesitating, "she's unable to come to the phone right now."

"I came here to pick up the rest of my tools. Spencer's dad-" I began but was interrupted.

"Yeah, I heard." She said. There was a brief silence.

"How's Spencer?" I asked her, curious as to why she didn't pick up instead of Emily.

"Okay." She replied, nodding her head. "She misses you." She said sincerely.

"I miss her." I said. I did miss her. It had been a few days since I last saw her and now I began to feel she was avoiding me again. "She's been kind of confusing lately. The other day in my truck she said she was close to telling me something, to explaining what's been happening." I said suggestively, hoping Emily might have some answers as well.

"Well, things have changed since then." She said, lacing a bit of attitude in her words.

"Can you tell me anything?" I asked her, completely ignoring her last statement.

"No. I don't want to get in-between you and Spencer."

"I don't think this is about me and her." I was challenging her. Testing her to see if she might tell me something. I didn't like doing it, but I had to protect them. And I was going to do whatever it took. "I think it's something else."

It looked like she was about to respond, but then she turned around. She was looking at something behind hear. _Or someone_ I thought. Spencer had been in the room the whole time. Emily took a minute to figure something to say.

"Spencer's dad is here, you should probably come back later." I felt awful. Spencer definitely was messing with me, on purpose this time.

"When he's not here, or when Spencer's not here?" I said, letting the annoyance at her and Spencer's actions seep through my voice. Emily looked a little dazed for a moment. _Come on Em,_ I thought, _how stupid do you think I am?_

I hung up the phone and put it in my pocket. I walked around the truck to the drivers side and got in, slamming the door. I drove back to my house, thinking about what the hell they could be hiding. What would be so dangerous that they could not tell me? I had to take action, now. Otherwise I could lose them. My best friend, and the love of my life. Whatever or whoever was doing this to them I was going to take them down. This was game on.


	5. Through Many Dangers Toils and Snares

I went home, furious and depressed. I hated that Spencer would not only hide something from me, but also use Emily so that I couldn't confront her about it. I loved her, and I would tell, and have told, her everything. She was my world, and when she told me she lied to me that day in the truck, my world fell apart before my eyes. She wasn't the Spencer Hastings I fell for that day, something was possessing her. The thought of Spencer letting herself be controlled like that made me sick, knowing that she would never do that unless said person had an extreme advantage on her.

I changed into pajama bottoms and went to bed. I couldn't sleep, my mind was clouded of Spencer and her secret. _Or secrets_ I thought. Maybe this wasn't the only thing she was hiding from me. After all, she was clearly good at lying, since she lied to everyone about the Jenna Thing for years and she was constantly lying to her family about who's house she was going to at 10:00 at night. When I finally fell asleep, my dreams were haunted by scenes of Spencer and I. One particular scene kept reappearing in my mind.

_I pulled up to Spencer's house, and got out of the truck. I walked around to the bed, checking on the surprise I had made for her. I walked back around, and leaned on the door. I crossed my arms, contemplating what to say when she showed up. I had practiced so many times, but never found the correct words. Time must have escaped me, because before I knew it, there were footsteps coming from behind me. I turned to see Spencer, walking almost self consciously towards me. _

_"Hey." I said smiling._

_"Hey." _

_"You okay?" I asked. _

_"Yeah." She replied, quietly. _

_"You stopped picking up your cell, and when I called the house..." "_

_Well, my folks are in Philadelphia with Melissa." _

_"Something wrong?" I asked her. _

_"They wanted her to see a specialist." She said, pushing the strap on her bag back up her shoulder. "There's something irregular about her heart rate, so she's having tests done." _

_"You okay out here alone?" I genuinely was concerned. Spencer's strong, but I knew that one of her biggest fears was being alone. _

_"Yeah." She said, sounding a little unsure. _

_"You're finished with community service, right?" I asked cautiously. I knew for her it was a sketchy subject, just as reform school and prison was for me. Her parents turned a bad situation into a terrible one. They constantly scolded her, telling her how she was a disgrace, or nothing but trouble, or how she deserved someone like me. Someone like me, meaning an outlawed teenager who has been blamed for blinding his sister and raping her even though he was the victim for all of those things. No one understood, no one until Spencer._

_"No," she said blankly, "I tacked on two more weeks." _

_"Why?" I asked, beginning to scold her a bit myself. She was better than this, and she knew that. Why was she ruining everything for herself? _

_"Because Emily and I had a fight." She said, just trying to get the words out without yelling at me. _

_"Wha- whats going on? You're best friends." _

_"I'm getting really tired of people telling me who my friends are." She said in a warning voice._

_"Well," I said beginning to stand up and walk to the bed again. This time I jumped up and over the side of the truck, to excited to climb up the usual way. "two weeks, that's close enough." I whipped off the sheet covering the craft I had spent months working on. _

_Spencer's eyes widened and her mouth dropped a bit. This made me smile, not only inside, but outside too. I practically beamed knowing she liked something I had spent so much time and hard work on. I made it with her in mind, only her. I couldn't even bring myself to work on it with Jenna near me or around me. The same went for everybody else I knew, I couldn't think about anyone but her when I worked on it. Otherwise, it wouldn't have been right. It wouldn't have been Spencer's. I slid my hands down the top half of the rocking chair. She moved forward towards me, still gawking at the wooden seat. She tried to speak, but nothing came out. It was then I realized how amazing the craft actually was. From its intricate design at the head rest, to the evenly cut and magnificently detailed crescent rockers, it defiantly was impressive. It was made in her likeness after all. _

_"It's beautiful." She said, almost in a whisper. _

_"I made it for you." I said, suggestively, trying to show her how much I cared for her._

_"I can't take it." She said. I was crashing from cloud 9 now. I had been on top of the world, hoping she would take me back, tell me what was going on with all her secrets, that she would tell me she still loved me. I wanted, and planned for, all that to happen. But, things never really went the way I planned._

_"Why not?" I more said than asked, given I already knew the answer. _

_"We've been over this." She began. Words were coming fast, and I knew one of us was about to say something we would regret later. I just prayed it wasn't me. _

_"I told you the night they arrested you that I'm not walking away." I said exaggerating my last five syllables. _

_"Do you hear what you just said?" She said. _

_"'The night that I was arrested'." _

_"I don't care." I said, standing my ground. I wasn't giving up this easily._

_"Well, I do. Please Toby, I do. You have to stay away I from me." She said before walking past me and the truck to the door. I jumped down and filled the short distance between us. _

_"I can handle your father." I said, attempting to sound strong. _

_"This isn't about my father" _

_"Then what is it?" I once again said more than asked. She whipped around to face me. _

_"I don't want you handling my father, okay? I don't want to look over my shoulder and find you there. What I want, is for you to forget about me. If you really want to worry about somebody why don't you worry about your sister and that cop boyfriend of hers." She had crossed my line and she knew it. She was doing it intentionally to push me away, and, at the moment, it worked. I was fuming by the time she'd finished. I turned around and slammed the door of the bed shut. I walked around to the front, slamming the door again once inside and drove back home_.

I woke up to my alarm going off. If i didn't get up now, I'd be late for work. I sat up in bed, contemplating what to do about Spencer. I was getting tired of this. Was she really worth all this stress? I propped my head up on my hands, as I looked at myself in the small mirror facing my bed. Next to it, was a picture of me and Spencer. We were sitting in the red chair in her bedroom. Apparently Aria, Emily, and Hanna thought it would be funny to sneak in on us while things where getting pretty heated and take a photo. Hanna 'awed' after the flash went off. A week later, Emily came over with an envelope containing the picture. As much I was embarrassed to admit it, I loved that picture. It was one of our best. Spencer straddled me in a sitting position and had both her hands around my neck, while I wrapped my arms around her, trying to pull her closer. The kiss was obviously deep and passionate. It was like we were pouring every emotion we had for each other into it. That made me realize that she was worth it. Moments like that with her were worth walking around the world and back again to live out. I stood up stretching a bit, and entered my bathroom to shower for work.

After my shower, I got dressed and headed to work. The entire drive consisted of thoughts of my dream and events occurring afterward. I remembered how the day after Spencer and I had that fight, I went to the Rosewood Day swim meet. I was going to ask Emily about Spencer. I knew she would go, even though she had yet to be officially put back on the team. I hoped she would come around once she knew how worried i was about Spencer. She was my best friend after all.

_I walked in. It was crowded, but not so much that I wouldn't be able to spot Em. I looked around, and caught a glance of her wavy black hair and one of her favorite sweaters. She was leaning against a wall, seeming pretty calm about not being able to swim at the swim meet. But then she stood up, arms still crossed. I could see a bit of her face, and from what I could tell, she looked alarmed. I walked up to her and around the corner. I stopped when I could tell she knew of my presence. _

_"He follows her around like a trained monkey." I said, indicating Garett. After that huge argument they had over the phone, Garett had been sticking to Jenna like glue. Or, at least tried to. When Jenna wanted to keep her distance from you, she would find a way to do it. "It's worse when he comes to the house." I said as Garett took his ticket and walked away from the ticket booth. _

_"I didn't see Jenna." Emily said, following him with her eyes. "Is she here?" I looked behind me quickly, and then back to the direction Garett had walked off in._

_"Must be in the girls room." I said, reasoning. By now Garett had noticed our, most likely my, watching of him. He stood facing us, and began to open and slowly eat a granola bar. We made eye contact, but broke it simultaneously. "Still supporting the Sharks?" I asked her, trying to make conversation. She turned her body a bit to face me. She smiled a little too. Maybe things were getting better for them._

_"We're swimming against Rolin's High. Thought I'd make some noise." Things definitely seemed better. She was acting like her old self again. Now if only Spencer would too. I got lost in my thoughts and was shaken out of them when Emily began to walk away. I reached out to stop her._

_"Can I ask you something?" I turned her around to face me. She seemed timid. Almost as if she knew what I was going to say, but still not certain. _

_"Sure." She said._

_"What the hell is going on with Spencer?" I asked, shaking my head. She seemed uncomfortable. Her eyes found the floor for merely a second before they met mine again._

_"You'll have to talk to her about that." She said quietly "She's not talking." I said, remembering how she ignored my calls and texts, and shut me out whenever I reached out to her. _

_"I really can't help you with Spencer." She said breaking eye contact again. "Sorry." She turned to walk away again, but I repeated my actions from earlier. _

_"Emily," I said as I turned her around to face me. "don't you shut me out too." She went silent for a moment._

_"I'm not shutting you out. It's just not good for any of us right now, Toby." And with that she walked away. I didn't try and stop her, knowing I wouldn't be able to get any answers. Instead I walked over to the ticket booth to buy a ticket of my own. I stayed and watched the meet, the Sharks won of course. Even without Emily, they were an extremely strong the game, on my way home, I walked in on a pretty ugly confrontation between the four of them. But mostly between Spencer and Emily._

_I had been walking behind Emily on the way out, and saw Aria, Hanna, and Spencer cross their arms as Emily approached. They were putting up a front, ganging up on her. Spencer, turned to walk away, but Emily snatched her arm and turned her around. _

_"Okay, it's every man for himself." Emily said. She was angry about something. You could tell by everything she was doing. How she spoke, acted, and just appeared. Spencer's hands landed on her hips and her face hardened. "I want the box that Jason gave Aria." _

_"Well you're not gonna get it." _

_"Guys," Emily said, now addressing Aria and Hanna, "Spencer's only looking out for herself. We have to cut a deal with-"_

_"Shut up, Emily." Spencer said harshly. This was not okay with me. I loved her, but she couldn't treat Emily like that. _

_"Where is it?" Emily asked._

_"It's safe."_

_"Where?"_

_"Don't tell her." Hanna chimed in._

_"It's hidden." Spencer said. "And it stays hidden until I want it found."_ _**Wait, what? That was something Alison used to say. **__I thought. __**No, no, no. No, Spencer's nothing like Alison. At least, the Spencer I knew and loved isn't, and this isn't her.**_

_"You forget." Emily said, sounding truly offended, but still strong, "we all learned how to keep secrets from the same person. I bet I know where it is. Good luck." She said with fake kindness. She walked off and out the door. Spencer caught sight of me, still trying to figure out what happened. "Let's get out of here." She said to Aria and Hanna. They turned and walked out too. __**What the hell just happened?**__ I thought._

The next thing I knew I was at work. I unbuckled my seatbelt and got out of the truck. I was greater with some hellos but was still too distracted to notice. I got to work. We were still cleaning up a job that had been done for Mrs. Celeine, a pretty wealthy older lady who wanted us to do some work on her guest house. My mind kept going. I couldn't help but remember my going to Spencer's house later that night to talk to her about what was going on between Emily and Aria, Hanna, and her.

_I walked up to the back door. I was about to knock but I heard Spencer's voice coming closer. I pressed my ear up to the crack in between the two French doors. _

_"I'm going now." She said _

_"I think we're all set." She was on the phone with someone. Probably Hanna or Aria. They were clearly up to something, and a part of me knew that it was something to do with Emily, and what was driving them apart._

_"I'll see you soon." She said. She opened the door and went to leave, but I stepped up and blocked her. I couldn't help but glare at her. I was mad that she was doing this to me and Emily. She was treating us like Alison did. I know it's wrong, but I couldn't keep from comparing her to Ali. That was just how she was acting. She stood with her mouth opened, unsure of what to say about my sudden appearance, so I just walked into the house without saying anything. I heard her sigh behind me and I turned around to face her. _

_"Why are you here." _

_"To get some answers." I responded fast. "And this time, I'm not leaving without them." I said stepping a little closer._

_"Well, then you're wasting your time." She said, returning the cold look I had on my face. I stood there, perfectly content on waiting for her to come clean. She didn't though. And eventually conversation began again. _

_"Spencer," I said, the harshness gone. I didn't mean to come off so hostile, but I couldn't help it. "talk to me. What's going on between you and Em? Why can't you tell me?" She looked away from me, and I could see she wanted to tell me, but knew she couldn't. She looked back at me, her face becoming hard again. _

_"Because I don't want you to know. I don't want you to have anything to do with me anymore, okay? I said it before and I'll say it again, leave me alone." She shouted the last part and I stepped back, my anger returning. My fists were clenched as I stood in front of Spencer. I began to pace, stepping fast to try and release some frustration, but to no avail. My thoughts traveled back to their argument. It seemed hours went by before I spoke again, but it was only a minute or two._

_"You wanna give me a hard time, that's one thing. But you can't treat Emily like that. I'm not gonna let that happen." She was now putting on her jacket, and rolling her eyes at my statement. _

_"What is going on is between Emily and me, so just please forget it."_

_"Forget it?" I said sarcastically. She had moved closer to the door, trying to get away. I stopped her though, pulling her back inside. "I'm just gonna watch two people I care about just rip into each other? Right, I'm gonna do that." _

_"For everybody's sake just stay out of it!" She yelled _

_"Stay out of what, Spencer?" I yelled back. "After everything that's happened? How can you just stand there and tell me there's something I'm not supposed to know about?" She turned, and I followed. _

_"What do I have to do to make you leave me alone?" I grabbed her arm. Once we made eye contact I spoke. _

_"Tell me about the night you found the shovel." _

_"I told you!" She said. "I told you what happened!" She was making her way back to the back door. _

_"Yeah, you said somebody tricked you into to finding it, and believe you. But ever since that night the four of you have been acting like, like-" _

_"Acting like what!" She said. I tried to hold her wrists, but she struggled. Eventually she stopped and I kept her still. _

_"Like Ali's still running things." She looked scared now. Her eyes widened like they did when she had her lost puppy look on, but this was different. This was fear. "Playing you against each-other. Today at school, you sounded just like Ali when you talked to Emily." She was struggling again, and I tried to keep her here. To calm her down. But she wouldn't have it. She turned while still in my grasp, but she didn't get very far. "Jenna always said that you wanted to take Ali down. Replace her." A silence fell as she looked at me. It wasn't the usual, comfortable, silence we used to be able to share. The silence I craved for so badly. "I didn't think that was true until today." Her struggling began again. _

_"It's not like that." She said, coldly._

_"Then what is it like?" She turned around to face me again. _

_"I can't do this. Don't ask me."_

_"Spencer-" _

_"No, don't ask me now!" She calmed slightly. "Ask me after tonight."_

_"What difference is one night gonna make?"_

_"It could change everything but I need you to let me go. And I need you to promise you won't follow me." I looked at her, mentally accepting her request. I had to do this. This was the first time she offered answers, and I had to take this chance._

I snapped out of my trance to find that it was already time to go back home. I breathed in heavily. She never gave me the answers I'd wanted, and now she was shutting me out even more. Most guys my age only had to worry about sports and dating more girls than their friends. But me, I had to deal with a psychotic family, a sort of ex-girlfriend that's giving me some really mixed signals, and earning a living for myself. This hardly seemed fair. But the again, this was life. And not just life, life in Rosewood. Fair, doesn't exist.


	6. Blonde Leading the Blind Part 2

On my way home, I stopped by Spencer's to pick up the tools and scaffolding still waiting to be collected. Before pulling into the backyard, I checked to see if Spencer's car was there. The driveway was emptied. I knew that it was somewhat unreasonable, but if Spencer didn't want to be here when I was, I was going to respect that.

Once I pulled up to the scaffolding, for the second time this week. I climbed up and began to dismantle it. I noticed it was slightly shaky, but didn't worry about it, figuring it was just because it had been here for so long. I continued to take it apart, but then it started shaking. The next thing I knew, the scaffolding was plummeting, taking me with it. I hit the ground, hard. There was a sharp pain in my arm. Then everything went black.

The next thing I knew, I was in the hospital. Apparently, Mrs. Hastings came home and found me unconscious underneath the scaffolding. She called an ambulance and they took me back to the hospital. I was sitting in the bed staring into space when I heard footsteps coming towards me. I turned to see her beautiful face filled with worry. I wanted to kill anyone who would make her that upset, but then realized that person was me. I felt extremely guilty, but couldn't help the warmth that spread through me in knowing that she was scared by the fact I was hurt. I loved having someone who genuinely cared for me. It made me feel real, unlike what I felt when people told me to drop dead.

"Oh my God, Toby!" She said practically running into the room. I couldn't process what was happening fast enough and before I knew it, she was half on me and half standing on the floor. She kissed all around my face. I couldn't help but smile. I put my unharmed arm around her waist out of reflex. I moved my head to a position where I could capture her lips and hold her still. She tensed for a moment, but then relaxed and returned the kiss. She asked for permission and I immediately accepted. Our tongues battled as we each tried to pull each other as close as humanly possible. We broke when oxygen was necessary. When we parted, Spencer was smiling. I felt amazing. It felt like we were together again. But then, her eyes changed. She realized what she was doing around threw herself off of me. Her smile disappeared as I embraced the chill that came to replace the warmth that had been coming from her.

"Sorry," she said, "I shouldn't have done that." She looked at the floor. My heart sank. She did it again. She made me think we were going to get back together, and then she just played it off. Like it never even happened. She had only one purpose to come here, and I knew what it was. She only was here to find out how I got here, and if that had anything to do with the thing that was pulling us apart. Which, I had to convince her, it didn't. The last thing that I was going to let happen was whoever this was giving her another, more valid, reason for trying to stay away from me. I knew all that was keeping us from being together was her fear of me getting hurt because of someone threatening her. She still had to have feelings for me, right? If she didn't then why did she come here? Maybe she only came here because she knew she had to. She knew this was because of her. I hated blaming her for something she would never do, but it had been her coming to me that had made this person take action. Granted, I did make the first move on her in the truck, not the other way around.

"Well." She said. I snapped out my thoughts to try and comprehend what she'd been saying. Apparently I'd missed a whole conversation she'd carried on her own."What happened to you? My mom wasn't very clear about it, and I didn't know if it was serious." She said, stopping. Her eyes were filling with tears, and it made my heart sink. I was about to try and comfort her, but she began talking again.

"When I got the call, no one was sure how badly you'd been hurt, and-"

"I was lucky your mom came home." I said, trying to save her from having to spill everything. I wanted answers, but she wasn't ready to give them to me. And as much as I hated having to wait for her, I was going to. She wasn't ready, and if she gave me answers now, she'd regret it. She'd regret me. And that was the last thing I wanted. That's the last thing I'll ever want.

"I'm so sorry about yesterday." She said honestly.

"Spencer," I began, but she continued.

"No, if you had just gotten your stuff, then-"

"Spencer it wouldn't have made any difference."

"What happened?" She asked me, sounding genuinely concerned "I was taking down the scaffolding, and the anchors gave away, and-" I was going to continue, but saw a doctor appearing from around the corner of the hallway and walking into my room.

"You must be the Carpenter. I'm Dr. Kingston." He said with a British accent. His eyes drifted from me to Spencer. _Wait what? Is he... Checking her out? _I thought.

"Hello, Spencer." _He already knows her?_ Something was going on and I didn't like it at all. I had play it cool though. This guy wasn't a threat to me and Spencer's relationship. At least, not yet. I looked at Spencer's reaction to him. Fist her face was blank, but after he said hello, she lit up like a Christmas tree.

"Hi." She breathed through a smile. Okay, that's enough, I thought.

"You two know each-other?" I said butting in. I looked at Spencer for an answer.

"Yeah, uh, Wren used to date Melissa."

"I was engaged to her actually. Before something got in the way." He said looking at Spencer. I started to put two and the together, and came upon the realization that Spencer had been the thing that ruined their engagement, for a, now, clearly obvious reason. I snapped out of my thoughts to see Spencer and Wren smiling at each-other. But then Spencer's smile faded, probably remembering I was still in their company. I looked back at him and then to Spencer who had shifted her head so she could see me. She smiled awkwardly.

"So, uh, the x-rays confirmed the break. But it's clean, should heal well. We'll put a cast on it shortly but you'll need to spend the night."

"Why?" Spencer asked with fear in her voice. I dropped all my accusations about them and noticed that it was fear for me. Fear that something could be wrong. And it might have been wrong in a way, but her fear warmed my heart.

"It's routine when there's been a concussion, so don't worry." He said before a beeping rang from something in his pocket. "Oh, next emergency. I'll be back later. Try and be more careful next time, huh?" He said walking out. Of course he didn't leave until he could say, "Spencer." God that guy just made it on my keep far, far, away from Spencer list. Just nearly underneath Jenna. I had to get to the bottom of this. If Spencer was cheating on me, I had to find out. I didn't really want to know that she was cheating, but it would be better, I guess, if I did. I can't imagine Spencer would do that to me, but she has been kind of shifty lately. Maybe Wren was the thing that was pulling us apart. I really hated this guy. Maybe Spencer was afraid of him. He could be the one that was threatening to hurt me. Maybe that was why she'd been keeping her distance. Now I needed more answers. I turned to look at Spencer.

"Is there something you want to tell me?" I asked her, accusingly. It seemed I didn't even need to actually ask her anything anymore. She made every answer very clear. Of course, there were a few exceptions. However I didn't get an actual response. Almost immediately after I asked her, her text tone went off. She took out her phone and stared down at the screen. I waited a few seconds until she looked back at me. Her face was mixed with fear, confusion, and anxiety. An obvious sign something was wrong with her.

"That was my mom. She needs me home. Now." She said, half-heartedly.

"Spencer, you don't have to leave." I said. It was true. Even if she didn't give me any answers, I still enjoy her company.

"Actually, I do. She said it was an emergency." She said, not making eye contact. "We'll, get better, Toby." She said, waking out of the room and down the hall. The same direction, I noticed, as Wren.

After Spencer had left, I, eventually managed to sleep. The doctors and nurses were getting upset because I wouldn't relax enough to sleep, in fear that Spencer might return, this time with some answers. However, they gave me a pill that made me drowsy and eventually my eyes drooped closed. I woke up later, to a light room but a dark presence.

"Jenna?" I asked, wondering why she would show up. I mentally smacked myself for not telling the doctors she wasn't allowed to come see me. Ever. But I guess it wouldn't really have helped. Jenna has her ways.

"Why'd you go back to that house?" She spat, looking straight in front of her because she couldn't see me anyway. The medicine made me kind of hazy and instead of snapping back at her, like I usually would, I ended up stammering.

"I-" I began but she was obviously angry with me, so she didn't care. Instead she continued to rant.

"You were never supposed to go back, Toby." I looked at her with my mouth opened and forming an 'o' shape. My mouth began to close as I stared at her in bewilderment, the confusion and daze from the joined efforts of my sleep and medicine. "It is not safe with those girls, with Spencer-" she would've continued but I stopped her.

"Don't," I said exaggerating the word, "talk about her." My jaw tightened. I couldn't stand the thought of Jenna's voice saying her name. It infuriated me. But maybe that wasn't because I loved her. Maybe it was because she was lying to me and possibly cheating on me. _Possibly_, I scoffed in my head, _don't flatter yourself_. I did love her, yes, but I couldn't stand to think about her after the way we'd left things earlier this afternoon. "Don't mention her name." I said taking my eyes from Jenna and letting them wander. Jenna smiled her creepy smile and clumsily sat down on my bed. I hated to be this close to her. It made me sick. It still does.

"You need to be stronger." She said in a low voice.

"I don't want any advice from you." All I want, I wanted to add, is for you to go back into the hell-hole you came out of.

"Who else is there?" She said, tauntingly. She was trying to get me to be the Toby Cavanaugh I used to be. Shy, defenseless, self conscious. All the things I needed to be for her to get her way. Well that wasn't going to work this time. "That knows you as we'll as I do? That cares about you as much as I do." She said suggestively. Under normal brother-sister circumstances, that would have been completely innocent. But these weren't normal circumstances. And she was far from innocent. She put her hand on my leg, but I kicked it off.

"Spencer." I said calmly. After I did, she looked as of she was going to throw up.

"You know you'll never be happy with her. You'll never be at peace. She's haunted Toby. I know a little bit about that." I couldn't think of a response so I changed the subject.

"You shouldn't be here." I said in a warning voice.

"I'm the only person who should be here. We're family." I stared at her blankly, despising every word that came out of her mouth. "Whether you like it or not."

"Get out, Jenna." I said as collectedly as I could. After finally realizing she wasn't going to persuade me, she took the hint and left. I let myself drift to sleep again, hoping to dream about Spencer, and forget the events that had jut previously occurred.

-I woke up again and my room was dark, only being lit by a lamp and the lights on the ceiling. I let my head rest back on the pillow, wishing tomorrow would arrive so I could get out of here. I heard the door open, though, and looked to see who it was. When I saw the familiar face of Emily walk in, I smiled. Emily visiting would be pleasant, as apposed to Spencer or Jenna visiting being awkward and silent.

"Hey," I said, sitting up. "I told you, it's not that bad. I'll be home tomorrow." I finished casually. I breathed in before continuing. "I've been wanting to talk." I said in a more serious manner. Although not to serious, after all, it was Emily I was dealing with. She was silent for a moment before she answered.

"Me too." There was obviously something up. I would've bet right then and there it was Spencer related, but I didn't want to jinx it. People like me need all the good luck they can get.

"Emily, what's wrong?" I asked her. She sighed and walked to the chair closest to the door, but still very near my hospital bed.

"It's Spencer." She said. _Knew it._ Although what about Spencer?

"What? Is she okay?" I asked genuinely concerned for Spencer's well-being. I knew things were pretty rocky between us, but I couldn't stand the idea of seeing Spencer hurt.

"Before you and she got together, she was seeing someone else." Emily said cautiously. My eyes drifted down to look at the blue sheets lying on top of me. I contemplated whether or not this would be about what was going on between her and that Wren guy. My eyes went back up to her as she continued. "And, it wasn't right and she knew it. But he's back now, and,"

"What?" I said not meaning to come off as impatient but silently wishing she'd just blurt it out.

"It's not right again." She said looking away from me. So I was right. Right about all the secrets, and lies, Spencer's avoiding me, Wren knowing who she was, the way he looked at her, the way she looked at him. It all made sense. I was right. But I guess at the end of the day, I would have rather been happy than right. I would've rather had Spencer come clean about everything and just let me forgive her instead of letting Emily tell me about it instead.

"I don't-, that's not possible." I said. _So you choose now to suddenly have faith in your girlfriend. After you know she's cheating on you? _I thought.

"Why are you telling me this?" I said trying to hold back the tears that threatened to fall.

"Because I can't watch you get hurt." _Little late there Em_.

"No. Why are _you_ telling me this?"

"Spencer couldn't. She's been wanting to for a long time, but-."

"A long time." I repeated. My heart felt like it had been ripped out of my chest.

"I'm so sorry, Toby." She said, and began to leave the room.

"Tell me one thing." I was pretty sure, but i needed a proper answer. "Who is it?" She sighed, and stepped away from the door a bit.

"His name," she began, "is Wren Kingston."

"Knew it." I mumbled under my breath, turning my head away from Emily. "Just so happens that he's my doctor. I might have a little chat with him in the morning."

"Don't do anything you know you're going to regret later."

"But I already have." I said looking her straight in the eye. "Except it's almost the good kind of regret, where you know that a bad thing has to happen for something good to."

"What are you talking about?" I sighed and softened my voice. "Goodbye, Em. You're my best friend, and you always will be."

"Wait," she said quietly, "you're saying goodbye. Why?" She said, now almost in tears as well.

"Because tomorrow, I'm going back to my house, getting my things and leaving Rosewood. This time, for good. Now that Spencer doesn't want me anymore, I've got nothing holding me back. So don't expect to find me at my house tomorrow, because I'll already be out of this monster of a town." I said. Emily looked like she was going to respond, but instead rushed out the door and and ran away. God I felt awful. I hadn't meant to hurt Emily, I was just so upset to know that Spencer had been lying to me all this time. Acting like she really cared. Maybe that was why she'd never told me that she loved me. I'd sure made a point of telling her that every time I saw her. After every kiss, every hug, every date, 'I love you, Spencer' I'd say. Usually she'd say something cute like that she wanted to say it first, like she had the first time we, supposedly, exchanged 'I love you's. But recently, there had been no responses. Just smiling, or staring at me. I thought that was her trying to get ready to say those three words, but it had been just the opposite.

The next day I did exactly what I'd told Emily I'd do. i had a little chat woth my doctor. I woke up and waited patiently for the arrival of Wren. soon enough, he walked into my room.

"You feeling alright?" I turned my head to face him with a glare. "Is there soemthing I can get you?" he asked.

"Just some answers."

"Yeah, sure. What's ln your mind?"

"You and Spencer." He finally looked up from his clipboard and made ye contact with me. he looked fearful. Good.

"Oh," he said, straightening up, "well I kissed her, I'm not going to deny that."

"Big of you." I said sarcastically.

"But i was under the impression that you two were over, so."

"Did she tell you that?"

"Yeah, she did, actually."

"You should go now." i said signaling the door with my head.

"Come on, mate."

"I'm just saying i may have broken my left arm but my right arm's fine." We glared at eachother as he left.

I got home and filled a backpack with as much of my things as it could carry and tossed it in the cab of my truck. Then I put my bike in the back. I had gradually been working on it since Spencer bought me the truck, even though as far as my knowledge there was no need for the bike. I drove to Spencer's house and pulled the truck into her backyard. I quickly scribbled down a note to Spencer, telling her the truck was hers, and that she wouldn't have to worry about me being around. Then I got my bike out of the back and started it up. I left Rosewood, not exactly knowing where to go, but knowing that I would never, ever, go back. -

I'd stopped at a diner about three hours after I'd left. It was still fairly early, around 8:30, or 9:00. I sat down at a booth and and ordered my food. While I was waiting, I heard my phone go off. I looked at the caller I.D but it was an unknown number.

"Hello?" I asked into the phone.

"Hello, is this Toby Cavanaugh?" A female voice asked.

"Yes this is he."

"Hello, Toby. I'm Dr. Sullivan. I need your help."

-To Be Continued-


End file.
